Yes! Paesano’s New Ad Campaign Swaps Children With Changelings Who Are Programmed To Sing Ads To Their Parents

Paesano’s, famous for their radio advertisements mimicking well known songs, have gone above and beyond the call of duty in their latest ad campaign. No longer content with simply composing jingles on the airwaves, many Saultites have reported their children and siblings have suddenly began speaking exclusively of the great savings available at Paesano’s.

Rob Kowak, a local parent, has more:

“I was in the living room reading the paper, when my son comes marching down the stairs, going on and on singing about bone-in turkey breasts and hams on sale right now to the tune of Fly Me to the Moon. Anything I’d say to him, his eyes would just go black, like an animal’s, and he’d start again right from the top. He wouldn’t really stop until I actually went out and bought whatever it is he was singing about.”

“I remember he [Mr. Kowak’s son] had a birth mark on his right shoulder, but I don’t see it there anymore, so I’m starting to think he isn’t really my son. He looks and acts just like him, but every now and then, he’ll just start singing about new deals. If I ignore him he just stares at me. If he catches me with groceries from another store he just shrieks and tosses them to the ground”.

Mr. Kowak isn’t the only parent experiencing this issue, with at least 15 other individuals in the Soo, and a handful of others in neighbouring communities reporting similar phenomena.

“On the one hand, I want to know what happened to my real son. On the other hand, you know, truth be told, a good deal’s a good deal. And you gotta hand it to them, they put a lot of effort into their ads.”


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